Adams County Makes the News - Adams County Leader #37

The Adams County Leader        Published Weekly On Friday
Wm. Lemon Editor and Manager
Member State Editorial Association 
Member National Editorial Association
Official Paper of Adams County Price $2.00 Strictly in Advance

January 10, 1930
DR. HIGGS FIGURED IT OUT
San Diego, California
Mr. William Lemon
Dear Sir: That chain letter came a few days ago, and after thinking it over, I consigned it to the wastebasket for the following reasons.  First, if each person was to send on to seven more as directed, and it took one week to pass from one to the other on the average, in six months time there would have been 70,387,187,802,763,680,139,543 letters sent, which in plain English is seventy octillion, three hundred and eighty-seven pentillion, one hundred eighty-seven quadrillion, eight hundred two trillion, seven hundred sixty-three billion, six hundred eighty million, one hundred thirty-nine thousand and five hundred forty-three.  This is a greater majority than the Republicans ever carried Pennsylvania even with the help of Vare’s money.  To haul these letters, it would require one hundred quadrillion cars, making a train one quadrillion miles long and Bert Hagar and Swanstrom would not catch that many fish all summer.  And besides it appears that Tom Heflin started this and he starts too many things.

Aside from that, we are well and hope the natives of Adams County are the same.
Respectfully,
D. P. Higgs

January 10, 1930
BIDDING ON MAIL ROUTES
Postmaster Prout says that the bidding on star routes is going on merrily at this time, numerous persons being convinced that they can make some easy money running these routes over the next four years.  There is a route from Council to Cuprum, one from Council to Mesa, and one from Old Davis on Crooked River to Wildhorse.

January 17, 1930
WINTER PEARS DELICIOUS
We are indebted to Mrs. Wm. Wilson of Hornet Creek for samples of their winter pears.  And even now we are suspicious that they might have put one over on us and gave us fresh pears from Florida.  As Mrs. Wilson (Mrs., understand) is particularly known for veracity, we are accepting her word about these being pears grown on their place and stored for winter use in their cellar, and we are devouring them voraciously.

January 17, 1930
CORRECTION

In the arithmetical spasm I sent you yesterday about the chain letter accumulation that would occur in one half year, I made a mistake in that I put Octillion instead of Sextillion at the beginning of the total.  I was about to carry it out for a year, but I found that I was going to run out of figures.  Say, Lemon, seriously, one is surprised how fast multiplication will get into high finance.  The figures I sent you were absolutely right, except for the mistake noted.  I had some fun with the kids last night and they would not believe the total after they got it.

Raining to beat the band today.

D. P. Higgs

February 21, 1930
THE DOCTOR QUESTION AGAIN

Editor, Adams County Leader:

I was very much interested in your article with reference to a doctor for the county.  I hope you will continue to urge this matter through the columns of the Leader.  I had to cling to the front end of the car to keep a flashlight on the road because of the dangers ahead while taking our boy to a doctor recently, and I, for one, would appreciate having a doctor at the county seat.  A few miles of such driving might be all right under the stress of extreme circumstances, but 38 miles of it reminds one that a doctor should be nearer at hand.

We certainly do need a doctor.

There are a great many things a county doctor could do.  In schools, for instance, he could instruct the children on disease prevention, and I have seen some very efficient work done in this line by doctors working with the P.T.A.s of the various schools of the county.

Sincerely yours,
An Interested Leader Reader

November 14, 1930
HAVE TO GIVE IT UP

The editor of this family-fireside home-companion started something he can’t finish.  He just has to give it up.  You know it is often said that if we have bouquets—flowers to give folks—give them while the person is living and don’t wait until he or she is dead.  Piles of flowers on a casket are worthless to that departed one.  Or, if you have anything good to say about neighbors, say it now while they are living.  Don’t wait to say it in an obituary after they are dead.

But folks, it won’t work.  This editor tried it out, and has proved definitely that it’s a joke.  Some of our readers will remember that in recent months, this paper attempted to make a feature under a heading “Special Folks Among Us.”  For several issues, intermittently, we wrote complimentary resumes of different men or women who are our neighbors.  Well, sir, every time we did so, we stirred up a hornet’s nest of protest.  Various and numerous readers would joke and jibe us about those things we said about so-and-so.  Then we would try again and attempt to pick a better subject, someone we suspected might run the gauntlet.  But no use.  We just quit.  So don’t tell us to hand bouquets to living folks.  We are going to wait until they are dead, and then no one dares jibe us about it.

compiled by Eberle Umbach